Day 4... PHWOARRRR!

Oh yeah, I can't believe I'm halfway through week 1 already! So far so good, my nutrition is stellar and I've not skipped an exercise session yet! I'm so proud of myself. (Pats self on back)

I'm really looking forward to my free day, not because I can eat whatever, but because I can have a well deserved sleep in! Yawn, 6:30am... arrrgh. My NEW habit will form soon, right? On sunday I'm not going to go crazy, I'll keep it clean, but I will have a glass of champagne and a baby cup of rich chocolate icecream.

This whole thing has made me so focussed, I have a goal in mind and I want to smash it! I've got a gorgeous lingerie model stuck on my fridge at the moment (my hubby is not complaining!) and when I complete the 12 weeks, I'm going to get a shoot done with exactly that pose, in similar underwear to show how far I've come. I can't wait! Rain, hail, shine, I'm going to do this!

Day 2 BFL Challenge

Well the hard part is over. Starting. Now all I have to do is take one day at a time for the next 83 days and I'll reach my goal.

Getting up today was traumatic. 6:30am is when NIGHT SHIFT workers arise! Arrrgh. I DID get up though, had a little pity party and then just did it. Took the dogs for a big long walk and made myself a leisurely breakfast before work, omlette with feta, tomato, basil, parsley and red onion, as per yesterday. Do you know what? I actually enjoyed it once I got moving. It was very pleasant, not many people around and sunny and warm, not hot. Beautiful.

They say habits take 28 days to form. 2 down, 26 to go!

Eating all of this food is a bit confronting, you start feeling really hungry, even though it feels like you just ate! I'm thinking of taking photos of my meals and posting them here, so I can remember them when I'm stressed or busy and can't think of anything to have. Not that I'm a food stylist, but I do like to think I can cook well, Donna Hay watch out!

Cardio tonight, I'll have to go off to bed a little bit earlier I think! I have to avoid as many negatives as I can so that I keep it going. Positive association. I read somewhere that a lady uses extra soft scented towels for her workouts and makes sure to have a relaxing bath afterward as a reward. Subconciously, we need thing like that to feel good when we are cultivating new habits.

Body For Life 12 Week Challenge

I thought it was appropriate to post an old school weight lifter chick, Rachel McLish, Ms Olympia 1980 herself, because I have decided I need to get back to basics. What a role model!

I'm ditching the Warrior Diet for a Body-for-Life type plan. Although I HAVE increased my muscle percentage, my body fat has only changed minimally. I enjoyed the freedom that comes from eating one meal a day, but wanted better results than I was getting. As I progress, I might go back to it, I think there's some very good science behind it. That's the problem I guess... there is reasonable science behind A LOT of different diet plans, that is why most people are hopelessly confused! Also, I'm afraid it is slowly wearing away at my resolve NOT to go back to my disordered eating. My attitude towards food of late has been less than stellar, and I was finding myself restricting again in an effort to speed up my fat loss. BAD IDEA, I know. *sighs* I really don't want to go down that self destructive path again, so I'm turning around now, while I can still see the forest, so to speak!

Based on Skwigg's great results (I've been a secret fan of hers for a long time) I've bit the bullet and committed myself to a 12 week Body for Life Challenge. That means lots of small meals, with emphasis on protein and workouts 6 days a week, 3 weights sessions, 3 cardio. There's a cheat day every week and a sleep in too. (Ahhh.... bed. I love my bed.) I'm not sticking to the BFL plan exactly, I'll use it as a rough guideline with most of my nutrition coming from whole foods rather than protein bars, shakes and products. I'll use a shake or two here and there but not every second meal! The whey protein I use is cold filtered and plain, with no flavours or sweeteners, mixed with water.

Unfortunately, because I'm from Australia, I can't actually enter the comp. So, I thought I might enter this one instead. Not quite the same prize pool (pity, the extra cash would have come in handy :)), but it is the same length and gives me something to work towards, a tangible goal. Besides, it's not about the money, it's about how I feel, setting and achieving goals, self esteem and discipline. I have never in my LIFE been able to get up out of bed at 6:30am! Not that I didn't want to or that I had no alarm, the reasons to get up just weren't good enough and my bed is so cozy and warm.... Ah, no, I'm NOT a morning person! So even if I can achieve THAT, this attempt will have been worth it.

I printed out a diary with every day for the next 12 weeks, workout plans, meal plans, actual meals, milestones and measurement goals. I've also taken some before shots and stuck them on the fridge with the date. As I complete each month, I'm going to take a new photo and stick it up there alongside the original. So motivating! I've outlawed banned substances such as biscuits and there is a strict edict that will be enforced regarding chocolate consumption and location. I've set alarms and reminders on my phone until DECEMBER (I've TRULY lost it this time), 6:30am wake up call for my morning workout, 10:30am snack, 12:30pm lunch, 3:30pm snack. They've only just been set today and already they were helpful, I got busy at work and almost forgot to have the mid afternoon mini meal! Whoops!

So Day 1, so far, so good! I'm feeling very motivated now I've committed to this plan. Anyone else out there doing it? Let me know!

Meal 1: 2 egg (free range) omlette with chopped tomato, spanish onion, feta, coffee
Meal 2: Protein shake, apple, water
Meal 3: 2 tandoori chicken legs, 1 cup of fruit (pineapple, strawberries), water
Meal 4: 1 cup of beef and vegetable curry, herbal tea, water
Meal 5: Steak, steamed carrots, roast beetroot, roast onion and tomato gravy, diet coke (slaps wrist)
Meal 6: Protein, piece of fruit, herbal tea

Today's exercise: 6:30am 45min pilates session, 6:30pm 45 min weight training - arms

Day 2 here I come! Yawn, got to go to bed, early start tomorrow. For once! haha

The beginning. Again.

Yet again, I'm on another 'plan', 'diet', 'lifestyle', 'regime' etc, etc...

I'm not going to stop blogging about all of my foibles in the controversial world of nutrition. There's too many people out there who are like me! I know it's not PC but I'm probably going to be on a 'diet' my whole life. Whether that's for muscle gain, fat loss, boosting my immune system, allergies or more energy, I've come to the conclusion I MAY NEVER get over it and eat like a 'normal' person.

I like being weird! I really like my new Warrior Diet. I feel so freed from food and have some time on my hands again. I have energy to get through the day and I'm sleeping very well. It's made me pull up my weight lifting socks and get into the gym again. I'm actually managing to do two weights sessions a week... consistently! If other people knew I was eating one big meal a day, they would probably freak out! "Why aren't you eating!", "Skipping meals is unhealthy", "You're going to wreck your metabolism", "Saturated fat is bad for you", "Eating at night makes you fat".... Arrrrghh it goes on! (See my previous post for rebuttal of these reasons.)

'Normal' people... are you out there? What do you eat? Often I've seen women, in cafés, restaurants, at work and at home observe other women eat. Are we all alike? So curious to see exactly what the other eats. Especially 'thin' women, they are the worst of all! They see a relatively slim woman, perhaps like themselves and check whether they eat, what they eat and how much. Why do they do this? Because the unspoken, secret truth is: nearly all 'thin' women don't eat enough food.

All of the crap written in the press about skinny stars somehow losing weight without trying, or that they simply ate right and exercised... is a lie. The ones who do that aren't skinny, they are slim and healthy looking and have been for a long time. The skinny (bony) yo-yo ones starve themselves, have buliemia or cancer. That's my honest opinion.

To look thin and yet 'eat right' and 'exercise', you would have to be an athlete or bodybuilder to maintain such a low weight eating the recommendations of caloric intake various institutions cite. For example I'm 174cms high. According to my age and activity level, nutrition websites say that I should be eating 2373 calories to maintain my weight. HA! When I DID eat that much I reached my heaviest weight VERY quickly. Is there anyone out there who is slim and fit that eats as much as this?! I'd love to hear from you.

Politically incorrect: Warrior Diet

OK so I've been eating very clean with protein at every meal and VERY limited carbs for the last three weeks. I haven't noticed a change on the scales, or how my clothes fit indicating muscle gain and fat loss.

Being a sugar addict and eating NO SUGAR and no treats except one apple a day, it has been killing me. I must admit, my sugar cravings have lessened amazingly, to the point that I no longer crave sugar ALL the time, now just when I'm tired or stressed. It has also dramatically improved my mood and energy levels.

That being said, I am so disappointed that my body hasn't changed at all physically. I FEEL better but I look the same. It really rocks your confidence, especially because I have been SO STRICT. I've amazed myself at my willpower!! Low carb eating is definitely better for your mind, but I want body changes, more muscle in particular. Here's a sample of my recent diet...

Day 1

Breakfast - 2 free range eggs, 2 pieces nitrate free bacon, 1 grilled tomato, 1/4 chargrilled capsicum, white coffee no sugar.
Lunch - Large (3 1/2 cups) salad of shredded grilled chicken breast (one fillet), red cabbage, cos lettuce, raw beetroot, sunflower seeds, apple cider vinegar and extra virgin olive oil (so yummy, love the crunchiness).
Afternoon - Cup of tea with milk.
Dinner - 2 free range eggs, big bowl of homemade cream of cauliflower soup (in a hurry that night).

Day 2

Breakfast - 2 free range eggs scrambled, 3 slices grilled eggplant and 1 grilled tomato, white coffee no sugar.
Lunch - Grilled snapper (about 100g) with lemon butter sauce, steamed baby vegetables (1 1/2 cups).
Afternoon - Cappuccino (weakness! hehe).
Dinner - Cheese platter: assorted cheeses, pickled vegetables, olives, carrot sticks (instead of crackers), avocado, smoked salmon, mineral water in a wine glass! (friends were drinking red wine) I can’t say how much I ate for certain (over a few hours) but I ate until I was satisfied.
Supper - Cup of tea with milk.

Day 3

Breakfast - Tin of sardines on a piece of toasted rye sourdough with butter, white coffee.
Lunch - Large (3 1/2 cups) green salad with a snack size tin of tuna in extra virgin olive oil.
Afternoon - Cup of tea and a handful of walnuts (not enough protein at lunch).
Dinner - Homemade spaghetti sauce (1 1/2 cups) (ground beef with same amount of beef heart minced through) with steamed shredded silverbeet (3 big handfuls) instead of pasta.
Supper - Baked green apple with double cream.

This is just a few days, but I hope it gives you some idea of what I was eating. I try not to eat any processed foods if I can help it, so I cook everything myself. Luckily, I love cooking! If I make a big meal one night, my husband and I can have leftovers for lunch or dinner the following night. This helps as a back-up, I work four days part-time and sometimes just can’t be bothered cooking. I’ll either re-heat some leftovers in the oven, or defrost a couple that I’ve frozen beforehand. Or we’ll have something simple like a Spanish omelette for our dinner.

I often use a crock pot, which is so great if you have to go to work! A lot of the NT recipes can be converted easily into crock pot recipes. I like to cook bone broths and stocks, soups, curries and stews in mine. So easy, so delicious. One of my favourites is ‘Lamb in red wine’. Chuck in your lamb (necks with the bone in work well for this), chunky pieces of carrot, a chopped onion, garlic, a bay leaf, sea salt and black pepper. Pour over wine and water mix 1/3 water to 2/3 wine so it just covers the meat. Leave on low all day and be welcomed by a home filled with heavenly smells. When I first made this my husband thought I had gone French on him!

Obviously I have to work on my coffee addiction (from the diet days above)… But today is my fifth day that I swapped coffee for dandelion tea. I’m not feeling too bad, the lack-of-caffeine symptoms seem to have dissipated somewhat.

SO....

I've decided to try the Warrior Diet by Ori Hofmekler. Similar to IF, but you can actually eat if you need to during the day, IF advocates NIL during the fasting cycle. So here's how it goes... Undereating cycle: Breakfast to dinner (PM), then Overeating cycle, a four hour period which you can eat as much paleo style foods as you need to feel satisfied. You can also have red wine with your meal and a small dessert or some carbs to finish up! Obviously the emphasis is not on the sugar, paleo style eating is all about natural foods, but there is no real restrictions on what you can eat. It will work better if your main meal is low-carb, but not necessary especially if your body is craving. It also dictates one session of high intensity weight training, using freeweights and two sessions of cardio a week. Walking on other days is fine, but Ori cautions about over-training.

I'm ready to try! I really need to gain some muscle if I want to protect my health for the future. For all the nay-sayers who say one big meal (albeit containing all the food groups in a whole food state and a whole day's worth of calories!) is unhealthy here's some reading material for you.

MYTH: Eating late at night is bad for you

MYTH: Skipping meals is unhealthy

FACT: Feeding cycles protect the body from disease

Happy reading!

Paleo style eating

I've long been a believer that whole foods in their natural state are the best for you.

The less processing the better. Eg: cold pressed oils, whole fruits and veggies, free range hormone free meat, eggs and wild fish, soaked wholegrains, rice and nuts, limited amounts of natural sugars like honey, molasses and palm sugar, raw or at least unpasturised milk, butter, cream and cheeses.

I've taken on board the nutritional guidelines from the Weston A. Price Foundation and the Paleolithic diet. And since almost cutting out sugar completely, I have been feeling so much better! More energy, less moody and I'm sleeping very well. The first few days were hell on earth, but I'm determined to do the best thing for my health.

My rule of thumb is: KEEP IT SIMPLE and eat as little grains and sugars as possible. At the moment I'm being very strict, I'm having one apple a day only and no wine, no bread, no fruit... you get the idea. LOTS of veggies and protein, with some fats on top for satiety. Feel great and the sugar cravings are becoming less each day. Goodbye Candida, headaches and tiredness!

I’ve just started weight training again after about four weeks break (slap!) and am loving it. I’m going to be doing two sessions a week again and I’m really looking forward to it now I’m sleeping better and have more energy.

In September the company I work for is moving into our new office which is only 3kms from my house. I’m planning on riding my bike to and from work each day (how very French) which will make 4 days biking in total (ooh and 24kms). So between the weights and the biking I should get pretty fit (and save petrol)! It means I can skip my lunch hour walks and use the time for relaxing over my lunch and unwinding, instead of scarfing it down and rushing to the park! I’m still going to be doing that until we move, but hey, there’s only so many hours in the day and I’ve got to find time to move it. Right now, there is no way I’m getting up in the dark! Dark is for sleeping right?

Food and mood

Well I have to report that my IF experiment didn't go too well. If anything, it has fuelled my food anxieties and started pushing me backwards into the realm of ana. So here I am, over 30 days later struggling to regain sanity. It didn't help me reach my goals and improve my health, it made me obsess all over again.

The whole point of this blog was to prove that I'm bigger than this, I can let go of all my food fears and reach a place where I'm happy with who I am and well enough to deal with life's hurdles, not go diving for cover in the safety of an eating disorder!

So I've taken positive steps towards a complete about-face. I've been seeing my naturopath and she's got me on B12, 5-HTP, cod liver oil, chromium, glutamine, zinc and magnesium to help with my anxiety, insomnia and depression which seem to be working... thank goodness. I feel like I'm constantly popping pills! But I'll do anything to feel better. She's also got me on a muscle building diet (so I can lose fat and tone up easier) eating 3 meals a day plus snacks to help me regulate my hormones, which will help my anxieties and moods. NO SUGAR (arrrgh it's killing me), no grains or alcohol for the time being... at least until I start sleeping and feeling better. Here's a sample of my daily diet mostly protein and veggies:

Brekky: 2 whole eggs (scrambled) and tomato or eggplant
Snack: Handful of nuts
Lunch: Fish and big salad
Snack: Handful of nuts
Dinner: A Protein and steamed or stir-fried veggies
Dessert: Baked apple with natural yogurt or cream

I was VERY SURPRISED I haven't gained eating this way and it's triple the calories I was eating! At first it felt like a lot of food but I'm getting used to eating more, I'm trying so hard not to be negative about food and weight. I've stopped weighing myself because my naturopath does body fat analysis with a special machine, so as long as I see muscle mass go up and fat mass go down, I'll be happy. At the moment I'm 22% fat which is under optimal by 2kgs, but the worst part is I'm under on muscle mass by 4kgs!!! Gotta fix that or I'll end up weak, sick and with osteoporosis!

My next visit is in a couple of weeks so I'll fill you in on how things go, I'm really trying hard not to stress out about this, treating myself gently. I'm barely able to just get through each day right now! I still want to lose weight but I can't risk my health anymore. I'm hoping I can reach my goals in a wholesome way. As long as I get somewhere close to my weight when I was 20 (around 56kg), even if I never reach my goal weight, I want to be able to accept myself the way I am.

That's only about 7kg total, quite doable. If things don't change soon though, I'll go crazy! It's a fat loss diet I'm on, that has worked for hundreds of people of all ages, so I'm confident if I keep with it SOMETHING will change. I hate being ruled by food and obsessing about every single thing that goes in my mouth. I hate having a one track mind, like there's nothing else in the world to think about! I'm not creative, I'm bitchy, I'm anxious, depressed, an emotional wreck that can't cope with life... that is NOT ME!

So, fingers crossed... hope everyone out there is doing better than me and achieving their health and fitness goals. If you have any advice or encouragement it would be much appreciated.